Valentine's Day: 10 Ways to Share the Love!

I've heard all the jokes, depressing acronyms, and cynicism February's annual celebration of amour tends to bring out of people (mostly single, I might add). I even know of couples who "hate" it for its clichéd-ness, but still go out for dinner so they can "make fun" of all the romancing around them. (Whenever I hear of this, I want to say: "BUT YOU STILL WENT OUT FOR VALENTINE'S DAY! You still contributed to the commercial success of the Hallmark Holiday!")

But I digress. If your February 14 modus operandi involves takeout Chinese, a quart of ice cream, and you sitting by yourself watching a horror movie Netflix mailed to you (so you could avoid the parade of last-minute roses and lovey-dovey cards coming out of the store where your local Redbox is located), maybe it's time to rethink Valentine's Day.

Let's face it: Valentine's Day can be depressing for those of us without a date. But it is equally true that though we may be single, we are not alone—and that love, in all its many forms, is not reserved solely for romantic pairs. Here are 10 easy ways to share the love on Valentine's Day—no date necessary!

If you're single, chances are you have single friends, too. If that is the case, instead of spending the day alone, throw a party for your single friends. To make it simple, ask everyone to bring their favorite dish (as a Baptist, I can attest that there's nothing more appealing than a potluck!) and favorite game. Spend the evening eating good food, having fun, and celebrating true friendship—the most valuable, and rare, of all human loves.

My personal library is not yet very large, but it is meaningful. Though I have bought many of the books myself, those I received as gifts I always remember in light of the person they came from. For instance, one of my very earliest memories is receiving a box-set collection of Laura Ingalls Wilder's Little House on the Prairie books—and now, over 20 years later, those books still remind me of the Christmas my aunt and uncle gave them to me. They are worn, their bindings taped together from many readings and re-readings. I trace my love of literature back to receiving those books—feeling the weight of the set in my 5-year-old hands, staring with wonder at the shiny spines as they sat in their shrink-wrap, waiting to be discovered.

This Valentine's Day, share the love of reading with a child you care about. Whether you give them something that was significant to you as a child or something new you can experience together, the love of books is one that keeps on giving, and will never grow old. Plus, they'll always remember you when they read it!

So you're single, your friends are all married or otherwise occupied, and you're back to giving that horror flick a sidelong glance. Fear not! Do you have family living nearby? Specifically, a grandparent or older relative who would otherwise be spending Valentine's Day, like most other days, alone? Put a spring in their step by spending the evening with them. Offer to make dinner (or order it), bring a nice dessert and a card, and spend some quality time catching up. To someone in the autumn of life, the greatest gift is that of time—and a willing listener doesn't hurt, either. You'll give them something to remember for a long time, and you'll benefit from an evening well spent, distracted from yourself.

In a list that is trying to avoid selfishness and self-pity, this might seem out of place. But here's the thing: you can't "love your neighbor as yourself" until you love yourself. All the fad diets, gym memberships, expensive clothes, and uncomfortable shoes out there suggest to me one thing: we don't really love ourselves. We love who (or what) we want to be or want other people to think we are, not who and what we really, truly are. So this year, treat yourself to some pampering. Don't focus on changing yourself, but realizing your full, natural potential. Get a massage, a manicure and/or pedicure, a facial, whatever it takes to remind you that you are a beautiful and valuable person, whether you have a +1 or not. (This option is even better if you have a best friend to share it with!)

Sometimes the best way to get out of yourself is to invest in someone else (see #3 above). But if you don't have family nearby, invest in total strangers. Whether you are usually of the volunteering type or not, go find somewhere to help out for the evening. My guess is that places like soup kitchens, animal shelters, and other charitable organizations dependent on volunteers are going to be short-handed on the Most Romantic Night of the Year. The greatest love you can show is one that cannot be repaid by the recipients; but you will without question be more than rewarded for your time and efforts in intangible ways.

Are there important children in your life? Say a niece or nephew, or a child you mentor, or otherwise have a lot of influence on? Two facts about your situation: first, their idea of a great time is any time spent with you; and second, their parents will be thrilled for some free babysitting so they can go out and celebrate themselves. Offer to take the child for dinner, maybe let them choose where, and for a kid-friendly movie (where you won't be trying to see between the tilted-together heads of V-Day revelers). Don’t forget a special gift appropriate for the child's preferences (maybe see #2).

What's your right-brain outlet? Is it cooking, baking, crafting, writing, photography, or something else? Valentine's Day is a perfect time to indulge your creative side, whether you use it for your day job or not. Whip up a big batch of cookies, and pass them around to your neighbors. Or take them to work on February 15 and share them with your coworkers. If you're into yarn crafts, start a project as a gift for someone: a blanket for a friend with a new baby, for example. Work on that scrapbook of your trip to Paris that has been languishing for three years. Try a new gourmet pasta recipe, and eat it on your best dishes. In my case, I may be continuing work on 2011's NaNoWriMo novel, which is now at 70,000 words and still not finished . . . but the free time of an unoccupied evening might be just the impetus I need. If none of the other people-including options have panned out, you may as well use your evening at home productively!

As a potential bonus here, if the child you were thinking about in #6 is of a similar creative bent, take some time to teach them your favorite hobby. Much like sharing books, sharing a love of working with your hands is an inexhaustible gift!

Spend some time thinking about the important people in your life, and the special ways they have contributed. Maybe even take some notes. Then, get out some nice stationery (if you're crafty, create your own!) and write thank-you notes to those people for the ways they have enriched your life. You will enjoy reliving the memories, and when they receive your notes in a few days, they will no doubt be surprised and touched by your thoughtfulness.

All right. So you've been through the list, and you've done everything in your power to (1) think about others, (2) be productive, and (3) pass Valentine's Day without getting depressed. Is it still not working? Well, if all else fails, and you're still wishing you had someone to buy that garish box of chocolates for, go ahead and get that Chinese takeout—but instead of watching the horror movie, hop onto the Internet and sign up for one of the well-respected dating sites that are available. You may have eschewed the idea for a long time, wanting to avoid the stigma of resorting to online dating, but here's a newsflash: the stigma is fading rapidly, if it's not already gone. Many people, probably some that you know, have found their "other half" online, and such stories are more common every day. If your usual patterns aren't bringing you in contact with the kind of people you'd want to date, let alone marry, maybe it's time to bite the bullet and see who eHarmony, match.com, or one of the other sites might find for you. Sure, it's a risk, and it's a bit of a splurge; but if you're not spending it on someone else now, maybe you'll have someone to spend it on next year. Worth a try? Why not!

And when you're done with all of the above, go ahead—Hub about it. If you're not a member of HubPages, sign up here and start now! It's fun, it's easy, the community is as upbeat and encouraging as any V-Day card, and it's ridiculously easy to spend hours engaged in writing, commenting, and lively discussions.

So there you have it—10 ways to not waste this Valentine's Day wallowing in self pity. Have fun, share the love, and have a Happy Valentine's Day!